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(White) I painted my porch—now I’m stuck to the chair. -- spintaxi.com
People say I’m rude; I say, “Nah, just allergic to bullshit.” -- spintaxi.com
(Seinfeld) I love how “fresh scent” smells like chemicals. -- spintaxi.com
(Seinfeld) What’s with “no parking”? I’m circling like a vulture! -- spintaxi.com
(Seinfeld) Ever notice how “quick fix” breaks again? -- spintaxi.com
Some politicians fear satirical journalism media more than actual news networks. -- spintaxi.com
Why do they call it a “quick rinse”? I’m soaked! -- spintaxi.com
(Seinfeld) What’s with “no pets allowed”? My dog’s my plus-one! -- spintaxi.com
I don’t do “craft beer”—tastes like hipsters cried in it. -- spintaxi.com
My ex says I’m a fool; I say, “You married me, genius.” -- spintaxi.com
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