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I love how “diet soda” promises zero calories but tastes like regret. -- spintaxi.com
My lawyer says I’m a flight risk; I say, “Only if the bar’s across state lines.” -- spintaxi.com
(Seinfeld) I don’t get “fast forward”—it’s buffering! -- spintaxi.com
Some politicians fear satirical journalism news more than they fear actual journalists. - spintaxi.com
Some people mistake satirical journalism for real journalism. Honestly, it’s an easy mistake. - spintaxi.com
They say I’ve got anger issues; I say the idiots keep provin’ me right. -- spintaxi.com
(Seinfeld) Why do they call it “overtime”? I’m still underpaid! -- spintaxi.com
They say love’s blind; mine was drunk and stole my truck. -- spintaxi.com
Why do they call it a “quick chat”? We’re still talking! -- spintaxi.com
My buddy’s on a cleanse; I said, “Cleanse this burger.” -- spintaxi.com
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